About much better now

My name is David Ford and I live somewhere in the centre of the global village. I’m no better (or worse) than you. I’m quite like you in many ways. I sometimes wake up feeling anxious, fearful. How will I get through the day? I’m very hard on myself, sometimes to the point of self-loathing. I want to do right by myself and my family. I want to be a success. Ever since I can remember I’ve wanted to “be happy” but recently I’ve started to realise that I’ve often been looking in the wrong places. You can’t be happy all the time. In fact happiness is incredibly fleeting and impossible to keep hold of, no matter how hard we try to grasp it. So I’m not trying to be happy. I’m just trying to feel better, much better…now.

I’ve read plenty of advice about writing a successful blog and the consensus seems to be that you should find your niche, find a topic that you’re passionate about and specialise. That sounds nice. I wish I had one topic that I cared about completely. Maybe, as I go, I will find my way towards a single purpose but for now my passion must be myself and the life that I’m living. If my writing helps me to feel better maybe it will make you feel better too.

The picture is of me as a child because that’s what I am, or rather what I have been. The way I’ve lived my life has only worked up to a point. Much of what I did and how I lived didn’t really work. Thankfully things have turned out pretty well, all things considered, and now as I put away childish things I have a chance to start again. But there’s no time to lose my wife’s having a baby in March 2009 and I’m still a child myself trying to make sense of this new way of living that I’m trying out. Let’s hope I’m a quick learner!

Everything I write comes from an honest place, some things may be inaccurate, generalised or ill informed. Feel free to pull me up when I get things wrong. I do my fair share of research but I can’t know everything and I won’t let the worry of making mistakes stop me from writing. So feel free to point out any errors but try to be nice about it if you can and I’ll try to keep getting better.